[Originally written Nov.1994] 

Three dates round Scotland supporting the Damned...hardly an offer that my (very fucking wonderful!) band the Gin Goblins was likely to turn down. No sireee. Damnation in Glasgow for the third time in under a year, Edinburgh for the first time in eight years, and that centre of the rock n roll universe that is Turriff for the first time ever! Events not to be missed, each and every one...
In typical Damned fashion, the bastards turned up at the Edinburgh Venue four hours late, and then decided that they weren't gonna bother soundchecking, meaning that we'd been sitting round waiting for no bleedin' reason. Obviously they were in no need of a soundcheck as the gig was a stormer. In fact, the last two gigs I'd seen them do had been even better each time, and I'm glad to report that they once more managed to outdo themselves and pull off the best show I've seen them do with the "new" line-up. 
A capacity crowd of old and new fans greeted the band, after a tremendous intro by some geezer who didn't seem to have any teeth (or any experience of introducing bands judging by how bad a job he made of it!). They launched into the first of many new songs, the excellent Testify, quickly following it with another newie, Shadow To Fall. I can't say just how great it is to see the Damned come on and play new songs...christ, it was over eight years since I'd seen such a spectacle! The crowd seemed to be quite happy with the new stuff (or perhaps unaware it even was new stuff...), but the intro to New Rose saw things going even wilder. Let's face it, that song is never gonna fail to get a place moving, and tonight was no exception.
Once more the band seemed to be in good spirits, which is another thing I'm more than happy to see. Fuck knows how many times I saw them when it was just too obvious that their hearts weren't in it. What I'm seeing now is a band that seems to be enjoying the playing just as much as collecting the cash at the end of the night. The new line-up really has given them a much-needed energy boost...
After no more than a moments rest, that old MC5 chestnut Looking At You was dished up with added guitar heroics from that ball of energy that is Kris Dollymore. Actually he seemed to forget to play the first solo, bringing the first of many laughs from the rest of the band. How he plays the guitar in all those ridiculous positions I'll never know...but it really adds to the energy of the whole gig. Finding a suitable replacement for Captain was always gonna be difficult, but they've managed to pull it off.
Not Of This Earth, another one from the new album, didn't grab me on first hearing, though after repeated listening slowly crept up on me, forcing acknowledgement of a killer chorus and a great ending. The ever classic Noise Noise Noise followed, after which Dave dedicated Disco Man to John Travolta. I'm sure the dimple-chinned one would've been proud had he heard the storming version of the Friday The 13th classic. The two guitars really worked well on this song, giving it a much fuller sound as Kris did the lead and Alan kept the basic song going in the background. 
Yet another new song was next, the Running Man, built around some wild wah-wah guitar and a more sedate pace to the previous few numbers. At least, it's sedate 'til the end when things hot up with yet more krazy guitar kaos from Kris. The chant of "Scabies is a wanker", which had been very conspicuous in its abscence was started up in the break before My Desire (yes! another new song!!). Rataliation was in the form of a series of gruesome faces pulled with seemingly no concern to the fact that the wind could change at any moment! Anyway, enough of silly faces, My Desire is another excellent song, again seeing the two guitars work together well. The new songs seem to be so well crafted, each with that certain something that raises them above the norm. 
An extended Nasty came next, seeing more smiles around the band as each member seemed to be trying to outdo each other in the out-of-tune vocal department. I think Moose won it though! Fuck, I keep repeating myself here...but once again the two guitars really made the song, as did the blow-out ending. "So much for art..." quoteth Dave.
It's always a pleasure to here anything from Strawberries live, as it's often given the cold shoulder in Damned sets. Gun Fury then, was one of my favourites of the whole night, but did leave me yearning for a Stranger On The Town, or a Generals (okay, the lack of keyboards might make that one a bit difficult).
Never Believe Your Lies saw the crowd wishing they'd brought along their lighters to wave about, having to content themselves with a gentle sway instead. This is one I'm really dying to hear on vinyl (not CD though)...the opportunity is there to go really over the top with overdubs, so I hope they do it (or have done, depending on when you read this). The build up to the end is excellent, with some great drumming from Rat, and surprise surprise, some great lead from Kris.
Having had a bit of a rest, the crowd once more went mental to Neat Neat Neat, another old favourite that'll never fail to get a place going. The middle part saw the band slip into a bit of the Doors' LA Woman, but not as drawn out as the later gigs would see. I Need A Life was preceded by an impromptu bit of Laurel and Hardy incidental music by Vanian, though for what reason we shall never know! Yet another up-tempo little number, it seemed to be over before it had even got going.
The end of the first part of the set was nigh, and what better way to round things off than with that Stooges work of genius, I Feel Alright. A rather fine version it was too, with Kris doing the show-off routine to the full, and getting picked up by Vanian for his troubles. Into the drum kit he went, but that master of cool Scabies was unperturbed, going on to come dangerously close to doing a drum solo. In fact, now I come to think of it, the Damned are about the only band I could watch do drum solo without having an uncontrollable desire to shoot them! All the parts of I Feel Alright seemed to disintegrate, with only a thin thread holding the song together until Vanian brought everyone back in, full steam ahead.
What they'd been up to in the dressing room I do not know, but when they came back on stage, the gods of chaos seemed to have taken over. Scabies gave a good slagging to some arseholes who were spitting (christ, some people never learn...why are they so eager to demonstrate that they are absolutely clueless about what punk was and is about, sad fuckers). This was followed by some people getting out of the crowd and attempting to take over the instruments. Obviously seeing a chance for an extended rest of his vocal chords, Dave invited the crowd to produce a singer for Love Song, which of course resulted in a couple of hundred people all claiming that they'd be able to do it best! One geezer eventually made it up, and the song started. What followed next was something I never thought I'd see...Dave Vanian stage diving!! It's true I tell ye, all true! He landed on the crowd, did a bit of the dying fly (remember Tiswas?!) and then acted out the rabid fan routine to the full. Meanwhile the geezer singing actually did a reasonable job of it. I'm sorry to say that the bass playing wasn't quite as good...more a case of "if I hit all these notes, one of them's bound to be right"!! It wasn't quite finished though, "Tonight on Hughie Green's Talent Time we have..." announced Dave, as yet another contender for the drum stool made his way on stage. "Rat Scabies" announced this star-in-the-making for the benefit of anyone who didn't know who the Damned's drummer is, before being told to "bugger off the stage" by the man himself! Smash It Up saw everyone back in their proper places, although Dave did end up having a good jostle with Rat after playing his head with a drumstick...oh such silly boys! Part Two saw everyone down to their last energy reserves, as the final song of the evening produced a mass outbreak of pogoing, the likes of which has not been seen for many a year (actually, it had only been a few weeks, but journalistic licence is a great thing).
So, the end of another Damned gig, and I have to say, it was one of the best gigs I've ever seen them play. Everything was there...excellent new material, classics from yesteryear, the energy and chaos that's essential for a real Damned gig, the band having a great time, a receptive crowd, and let's not forget an intro by a toothless man that doesn't know who the first punk band on TOTP were (answers on a postcard please). Fucking excellent stuff!
So, the first date of the Damned's trek round Scotland...and a stormer it was too...but what was the rest going to hold in store?
Arriving in Glasgow with plenty of time to spare, we managed to beat the band to the free credits that had been put on all the video machines so that frustrated musicians could pass away the hours between soundcheck and show time. Actually, they'd only put free credits on all the really crap games (like video golf for fucks sake!)...all the good ones were still gonna cost bucks, so no doubt us innocent-as-ever Goblins got the blame for playing all the good ones to death before anyone else arrived! It's not true...we was fitted up good and proper guv'nor. One thing that we are guilty of however, is having a bass player that was once sick over Kris Dollymore while drinking the Godfathers' rider many moons ago! Naturally, Kris has never forgotten that wonderful moment when he asked "is that wine or vomit", and was met with the reply "take your pick"!! It's the "take yer pick guy" were his first words on seeing the unforgettable boat race of the Goblins' bass maestro. 
Adopting a far more professional and grown up attitude, the Damned decided that they would soundcheck tonight, then they would drink copious amounts of alcohol thus rendering all preparation a complete waste of time. Finally going on stage at midnight, in a "merry" state of mind (in particular Mr. Scabies) they proceeded to slaughter just about every song they played!! Rat did admit just before they went on that he was pissed, and his drumming certainly seemed to indicate that this was no lie! It wasn't just the bands fault though, as the sound was pretty terrible throughout, a combination of a crap PA and a full pint of lager landing right on the mixing desk during the first song. People that throw full pints of beer obviously think it's a really clever thing to do, although in my opinion it's the equivalent of having a neon "ARSEHOLE" sign attached to your head. It's beer...it costs you money...you drink it...you get drunk...throwing it about just has no purpose that I can see.
Anyway, once again I diverse...the set list was basically the same as the previous night, although Kris was sticking in the start of "I Feel Alright" now and again, obviously as a kinda "let's get out of here now" message to the rest of the band. The untogetherness of the songs, the bad sound and the very boring crowd basically meant that this gig was a million miles away from the night before's excellent show. It was still enjoyable, but more from a "what are they gonna get wrong next" sort of viewpoint...there's nothing like watching a band struggle to keep a song from falling to bits completely! Old and new songs alike were treated with total indifference by most of the crowd, which struck me as a bit odd since they'd all paid £8 to get in! Some might say that's just dumb students for you, but you wouldn't catch me coming out with such stereotypical statements. 
Basically the entire gig was a bit of a joke...the awful sound made it impossible for the Damned to play properly, and the audience didn't deserve it anyway. A quick Love Song and Smash It Up finished the proceedings, leaving the band to swig from bottles of red wine as they increased the ferocity of the next days hangover. Actually, I think it's good to see that the Damned can still turn into a shoddy mess from time to time...just to show they're still human! 
Well, Glasgow was the gig I was least looking forward to, and all my reservations had been proven correct. Next up was, wait for it, wait for it...Turriff, or should that be TURRIFF! You've gotta make it noticeable in some way, and judging by our look around, printing the name in capital letters is about all they could ever do for the place. Actually, that's just my Big City mentality coming through there...the Rock Mecca(!!) is actually a great venue, run by very cool people (except the security who were so dumb I almost felt sorry for them...they tried to take my sandwiches and crisps off me at one point for fucks sake!). The thing with gigs in such out of the way places is that every fucker for miles around makes the effort to go and have as good a time as possible, as basically there's sod all to do the rest of the time (unless you're into the Young Farmers nights out). It's a very good idea for the Damned to be playing places like this, as there's actually a lot of people out there more than willing to be won over...and with the Damned opening another chapter in their history they can't have too many converts.
Amazingly the band had actually beaten us to the venue...we had a hellish time getting up and ready, so I don't know how the hell they made it earlier. Visions of dirt track roads had no doubt forced them to start their journey with plenty of time to spare!
Soundcheck was just finishing as we arrived (a rousing version of Testify), so the band (with at least one Scabies Jr. in tow) disappeared off into some corner of the hotel, until once again it was show time...
A much more receptive audience tonight, and a much more together Damned ploughed their way through the well-balanced set. The crowd seemed more than happy just to have a real band play for them, never mind a band of the Damned's caliber, meaning that every song went down extremely well. The old classics got the biggest cheers of course, with the triple-whammy of I Feel Alright, Love Song and Smash It Up finally sapping the last remaining strength of the very happy and very drunk crowd. 
The new new songs (ie those that were being aired for the first time) sounded better each night, and I'm now convinced the album's gonna be a winner. They fit in well alongside the old stuff, and let the two guitars work to their best effect.
So all that was left was us to go backstage and drink beer, harangue Scabies with cries of "we blew you away three nights running" (okay,not quite true, but we gave the sods a good run for their money), and ask Moose to tell us some jokes about eating cakes (as in Jo Brand!). Rat eventually disappeared for a mug of cocoa, leaving us to do the job of reducing people to piles of quivering jelly with our razor-sharp wit and unrelenting slaggings. Actually a match between the Damned and ourselves would've been interesting, maybe next time...if they're up to it!
So, there we left the Damned to go their merry way back to civilisation (well, Dundee actually, I don't think that counts). Previous commitments prevented us from turning up once more (we had a gig in a mental hospital… true! Those bastards at the Sun ruined it though). In fact, as I write this, the band are probably sitting in their dressing room thinking "thank fuck those Gin Goblin cunts aren't here"...or something. Anyway, over the three gigs I saw, there's still no doubt in my mind that the Damned are back to their best. Excellent new material, a whole new lease of life, a new LP on the way...yup, things are looking good!