[Originally written December 1986]

On first hearing that Naz Nomad & the Nightmares were playing at the Klub Foot I was really pissed off ‘cos I knew I wasn’t gonna be able to make it down. However, for some reason the gig on the 22nd of November was re-scheduled for the 20th of December, with another date the night before. I was able to make it to these gigs, so set about trying to get tickets. This proved to be fucking impossible. Everywhere I tried said it was too late for tickets to be sent up to Scotland, which meant I would have to try and get tickets down there… a pretty dubious situation. I certainly didn’t want to go all that way and not get a ticket; it’d be a right waste of my hard-earned cash.
As it turned out, everywhere had tickets and we’d no trouble getting them although we were charged a bloody extortionate booking fee. We would’ve been cheaper paying at the door.
Fresh from the overnight bus journey (on which there was quite a good fight up the back) me and my pal made our way round some of the collectors record shops, which wasn’t a good move as far as I was concerned ‘cos I spent a very large sum of money on Damned records, and couldn’t really afford it. But, when you see two metal master-plates for “Best Of” you’ve just gotta buy them haven’t you? (yes).
We made our way to the Klub Foot quite early (we had been planning on trying to meet the band, but as usual got delayed by stuffing our gobs with pizzas!) and were surprised by the lack of people about. Apart from two folk we’d met outside the Town & Country Club in July there was no-one.
Even though it was fucking freezing, we decided to hang about by the door to the place anyway. While we were waiting, first Buddy Lee Junior, then Nick Detroit appeared and buggered off down the road. 
We had to wait ages before the doors were opened and we could get inside. Hardly anyone had tickets so we were the first folk in the place, and what a place it was too… such elegance and style!!
There were two support bands to watch before Naz and co. hit the stage and I must say I wasn’t really looking forward to them as 99% of support bands I’ve seen were shit… BUT…
The first band on were the Flying Tractor Band who were quite reasonable. They did a cover of “Born To Be Wild” by Steppenwolf , which is a great song (although the Cult manage to do a crap version of it). I can’t remember much else about them except that their singer was a stupid posing bloody dick-face.
Next on were Pop Will Eat Itself who were absolutely bloody brilliant!! I’d never heard them before but instantly took to them when they did a version of Hawkwind’s “Orgone Accumulator”. Sigue Sigue Sputnick’s “Love Missile F1-11” was another of the covers “the Poppies” (as they’re now know by everyone who’s hip) did.
They did of course do plenty of their own… “Sweet Sweet Pie” (a classic), “Devil Inside”, “Sick Little Girl”. They finished up with the brilliant “Candyiosis” (the one that goes “what’s so fucking good about candy”!!).
After PWEI we had to wait a while until finally on walked the Nightmares, followed by Naz himself. His white hair matched the white trousers he was wearing, though nothing could match the gear Buddy Lee Junior had on; really disgusting sleeveless sheepskin coat with about two tonnes of medallions hanging round his neck. It’s a miracle he could actually stand up with them all. Sphinx was wearing a frilly jacket and the compulsory mirror shades. Due to the intense heat, Nick just had an open shirt on. He’d have melted if he’d had much more.
The American accents of the band reminded me of my trip down to London for the 10th Anniversary gigs, as that was all you heard everywhere you went… bloody American tourists with their ice creams and souvenir tea towels. 
A number of tracks from “Give Daddy The Knife Cindy” (the only LP ever to escape the vaults of the record company) were mixed in with some well-known psychedelic numbers, some of which I knew the names of, others that I only know the song itself. “Oh Yeah”, “Tonight” as well as the Rolling Stones number “Citadel”. The Naz Nomad version is certainly as good as the Damned’s one. In fact, Nomads vocals remind me quite a lot of Vanians at times.
Most of the crowd seemed to know all the Naz favourites : “She Lied”, “Nobody But Me”, “Action Woman”, “The Wind Blows Your Hair”… all classics from the long career of Naz Nomad & The Nightmares.
The Doors’ “LA Woman” rounded off the evening in great style, and even the walls were dripping in sweat by the end of it.
One thing puzzled me throughout the gig though. Some people in the crowd kept chanting “Scabies Is A Wanker”… maybe Rat was at the gig (I know he likes the band) but I never saw him anywhere. Naz asked “who is this Scabies person anyway?”, making it obvious he’s never heard the world’s number one band. Nick Detroit, obviously not pleased that Rat was attracting the crowds abuse instead of him tried his best to stir them up a bit.. “Tell me, do you guys all have individual brains, or do you just have the one between you?” he asked. It seemed to work as a torrent of abuse was hurled at him.
I was disappointed that they hadn’t played “Kicks” or “Cold Turkey” (two of my favourites) but the gig had still been great, and there was still the following night to look forward to.
Again we arrived at the Klub Foot too late to meet the band, but still managed to arrive early enough to have to stand in the freezing cold again. 
The same two support bands as the night before were playing. The Flying Tractor Band were neither better nor worse than the previous night, but I’d say that Pop Will Eat Itself were actually better (and this had nothing to do with the fact that none of the band had trousers on!!!). They played the same set as the night before, ending as usual with “Candyiosis”. If you haven’t heard Pop Will Eat Itself yet, go out and buy “The Poppies Play 5-A Side” 12”… it’s a masterpiece!
Here they were again… Naz Nomad & The Nightmares. Wearing the same clothes and playing pretty much the same set as the night before, it was basically a repeat performance. Just as brilliant though. A great version of the MC5’s “Looking At You” was one of the few set differences. The stage was now filled with six people as a sax player attempted to join in the fun… There was one problem though… his bloody mic wasn’t working which meant that you could only just hear him, even if you were right down the front. It’s a pity too, as it would’ve sounded really good with sax. At one point, Naz shoved his mic into the sax so at least some of the playing was heard.
Again, the final song was “LA Woman”. This time though it was an extended version, which went on for ages. At the beginning, Svenson’s guitar wouldn’t work, so while he tried to sort it out Naz broke into “Rudolph The Red Nosed Reindeer” to get everyone in the Xmas spirit. I’m actually very fond of Xmas spirit and drink it by the bottle.
Suddenly it was all over, and the stage emptied as the crowd recovered from all the vast amount of jumping about. The place emptied pretty slowly but finally we got outside and away from the heat. Very slowly we began to get cold.
Another horrible bus journey had to be endured before we got back to Edinburgh. On top of the usual horrors of a bus journey there was one bloody wanker who talked pish for the whole way. If it wasn’t for my Cherry Bakewell Tarts I’d have shoved a chair down his gob.
All in all the Naz Nomad gigs were bloody brilliant, though I must say a very big “FUCK OFF” to the girl who tried to push in front me for the whole gig on the Saturday night!
Finally, a small message for London Underground… “HA! I didn’t put any money in your bloody rip-off chocolate machines”. Thank you.

Photo credits : All Naz Nomad @ Klub Foot by Dave, acid kicking in towards the end.